My Account
0

Do You Have Time for a Date?

Whether you’ve got 10 minutes or all day, find the perfect date idea.

Share this post:

Date night

Here is my speed tour through the bottom floors of the Sound Relationship House.  

Continuously learn who your partner is.  

Show them that you know who they are.  

Tell them, often and with specificity, why you like and appreciate them.

To make a relationship thrive, you need to be continuously working through these levels.  I can hear your objections through my laptop screen.  You don’t have time to make a dentist appointment. How on earth can you schedule all that in?

The Micro-Date

Here’s my secret.  Schedule at least a micro-date every week.  What is that?  A micro-date is at least 10 minutes of uninterrupted time with your partner when the goal is to strengthen your connection.

  • At least 10 minutes = It could be longer, but shorter isn’t ideal.
  • Uninterrupted = No cell phones.  No kids.  No multitasking.
  • The goal is to strengthen your relationship = This isn’t the time when you work through conflicts or figure out logistics.  This is time for building Love Maps, sharing fondness and admiration, and turning toward one another.  Explore something together.  Laugh.  Ask your partner questions.  Listen intently and with curiosity.  Tell them what you appreciate about them. 

Date Ideas Depending on Time

So, how much time do you have for a date? Here are some ideas based on whether you’re squeezing in a micro-date or you have all day.  

10-minute dates

  • Walk around your neighborhood
  • Sit on your bed and listen to music
  • Hold hands, look at each other and ask open-ended questions
  • Have a snack and tell your partner what is important in your life right now
  • Backrub swap
  • Have a quick dance party in your kitchen

Hour-long dates

  • Cook or bake a new recipe
  • Exercise
  • Read aloud a magazine, newspaper, book (or listen to a podcast or audio book) and discuss
  • Look through old photos
  • Talk about how you first met and your early dates with one another
  • Play a board game or work on a puzzle

Date Night (a couple of hours)

  • Dinner and a movie (at home with take-out or at a drive-in)
  • Drive to a spot which has a good view of the night sky
  • Take an online class
  • Create a gratitude list: can you come up with 50 things you are grateful for?
  • Spend time on a joint hobby or an enjoyable house DIY project
  • Create a list of what you want to do together in the next 5 years

Day Date

  • Brunch and a hike
  • Visit a local landmark or do a virtual tour of a museum anywhere in the world
  • Explore a nearby town
  • Go to a local festival / farmers market / craft fair
  • Watch the sunrise
  • Go fruit picking

So, when’s your next date?


Sign up for the Love Notes Newsletter and receive a free download

Get the latest on relationships, parenting, therapy and more from the experts at The Gottman Institute. Sign up now and receive a free monthly download.

Share this post:

Jennifer Pesetsky serves couples and individuals online from Portland, Oregon. She comes to this work with a Law degree, a Master of Science degree in Library Science, and as a grateful Gottman consumer and practitioner. Grab her free Recharge Your Relationship guide and her free tool to help you create your own realistic daily self-care plan.

Recommended products

Original price was: $250.00.Current price is: $179.00.

Transform Your Relationship

The Gottman Relationship Adviser is a complete approach to relationship wellness. Measure your relationship health with the research-based Gottman Assessment, analyze five key areas of your partnership to identify your strengths and weaknesses, then start a tailored, step-by-step digital program proven to heal and strengthen your connection—all on your schedule and from anywhere.

The Adviser uses the legendary scientific Gottman Method to help you understand what’s really going on in your relationship—and gives you exactly what you need to improve it.

Original price was: $119.00.Current price is: $79.00.

Research-based Foundations for a Lifetime of Love.  The Gottman Relationship Coach is an inspiring and educational multimedia experience designed to enhance the well-being of relationships. Participants will be guided through research-based tools and communication skills that can transform relationships—all based on the popular Gottman Method. The first program, “How to Make Your Relationship Work”, is now available and includes:

  • The Gottman Method and How to Make Your Relationship Work
  • How do we predict the future of a relationship?
  • How to build a Sound Relationship House
  • What to do when the destructive Four Horsemen enter your relationship

“Buy Now” will take you to GOTTMAN CONNECT to purchase and view this product.

$599.00

Created by “the Einstein of Love” (Psychology Today), this two-day workshop is grounded on what actually works in relationships that are happy and stable. See for yourself why millions of couples worldwide have benefited from the Gottman Method.

Quote from participant in most recent Live Virtual Workshop:

The Art and Science of Love workshop- where do I begin? It was an absolute stellar workshop. We were looking forward to this for weeks, and it exceeded our expectations! It was well-structured, and well-organized, and provided a wealth of information with real-time demonstrations of how to work through specific scenarios. The outstanding support that was provided throughout the exercises with therapists on standby- WOW! Priceless!

Includes the Art & Science of Love box set.  Please allow time for shipping.  Please Note: This is a live online event. To attend, you will need a reliable internet connection. Our staff will reach out to you with your personal registration and access information.

Related posts

How to Be Kind When You’re Upset With Your Partner

Sanaa Hyder

Kindness is not just important in the heat of an argument. ...

Read More

What to Do During a Rough Patch

Are Rough Patches in Relationships Normal?

Dana McNeil

What you can do when your relationship is on the rocks ...

Read More

Authenticity in Relationships

Anna Aslanian

To create a close, intimate connection we need to be authentic in our relationship. However, this is easier said than done. ...

Read More

Couple not talking where one person is stonewalling.

What Is the Difference Between Stonewalling and Gaslighting?

Laura Silverstein

Read More

Couple using the power of touch to strengthen their relationship

Touch More, Touch Often 

Cheryl Fraser

How to strengthen fondness and admiration - without saying a thing ...

Read More

Couple having a romantic date.

Date Your Mate!

Cheryl Fraser

Why date night rejuvenates long term relationships - if you do it right. ...

Read More

Subscribe to Gottman Love Notes

Sign up and start your relationship transformation. Subscribe and get the latest on relationships, therapy, and much more from the experts. Includes a free download and access to special pricing on Gottman products every month