My Account

Building Trust In Stressful Times

If you establish positive rapport, you and your partner can make leaps and bounds towards the establishment of trust.

Share this post:

A couple walks down a boardwalk. The partner on the left has his arm slung over their partner.

Perhaps you read blog entries on Expressing Compassion and Empathy and Mindfulness in Emotional Moments and catch yourself thinking this is all well and good, but totally impossible to apply in my own relationship. As you cope with difficulties at home, on top of work and health stressors, reading books on improving trust in your relationship may feel unrealistic. Drs. John and Julie Gottman understand this and can offer help. 

Try simple changes. See these examples as inspiration. Feel free to improvise:

  • When your partner says, “I’m going to go on a run,” try this: “Great, I’ll watch the kids. When you’re back, I’ll take my turn?”
  • When your partner says, “I’d like to go see Mike tonight. He’s been asking me to see me for awhile,” say “Sure! I’ll hold down the fort. I’ll see Linda tomorrow.”
  • When your partner asks, “I need some time to work on this project,” you can respond, “I know you need to concentrate. I’ll go in the other room.”

This kind of communication is invaluable in any relationship. If you establish this kind of positive rapport (closely linked to Turning Toward Bids), you and your mate will gradually begin to make leaps and bounds towards the establishment of trust. Your friendship will increase as you begin to bond as a team, and your stress will cease to become such an obstacle to romance.

Share this post:

Ellie Lisitsa is a former staff writer at The Gottman Institute. She holds a PhD in Clinical Psychology.

Recommended products

Original price was: $250.00.Current price is: $199.00.

Transform Your Relationship

The Gottman Relationship Adviser is a complete approach to relationship wellness. Measure your relationship health with the research-based Gottman Assessment, analyze five key areas of your partnership to identify your strengths and weaknesses, then start a tailored, step-by-step digital program proven to heal and strengthen your connection—all on your schedule and from anywhere.

The Adviser uses the legendary scientific Gottman Method to help you understand what’s really going on in your relationship—and gives you exactly what you need to improve it.

Original price was: $119.00.Current price is: $79.00.

Research-based Foundations for a Lifetime of Love.  The Gottman Relationship Coach is an inspiring and educational multimedia experience designed to enhance the well-being of relationships. Participants will be guided through research-based tools and communication skills that can transform relationships—all based on the popular Gottman Method. The first program, “How to Make Your Relationship Work”, is now available and includes:

  • The Gottman Method and How to Make Your Relationship Work
  • How do we predict the future of a relationship?
  • How to build a Sound Relationship House
  • What to do when the destructive Four Horsemen enter your relationship

“Buy Now” will take you to GOTTMAN CONNECT to purchase and view this product.


Created by “the Einstein of Love” (Psychology Today), this two-day workshop is grounded on what actually works in relationships that are happy and stable. See for yourself why millions of couples worldwide have benefited from the Gottman Method.

Quote from participant in most recent Live Virtual Workshop:

The Art and Science of Love workshop- where do I begin? It was an absolute stellar workshop. We were looking forward to this for weeks, and it exceeded our expectations! It was well-structured, and well-organized, and provided a wealth of information with real-time demonstrations of how to work through specific scenarios. The outstanding support that was provided throughout the exercises with therapists on standby- WOW! Priceless!

Includes the Art & Science of Love box set.  Please allow time for shipping.  Please Note: This is a live online event. To attend, you will need a reliable internet connection. Our staff will reach out to you with your personal registration and access information.

Related posts

Couple turning against each other

Why Turning Against Your Partner’s Bids Is So Harmful

Vagdevi Meunier

Read More

Happy couple having a date night

Small Actions Make Big Impacts

Kendra Han

Based on the webinar How Small Actions Make Big Impacts: Daily acts of love to improve your relationship presented by Kimberly ...

Read More

Young couple on a couch

The Two Gottman Ideas You Should Be Talking About

The Gottman Institute

Dan Wile, developer of Collaborative Couple Therapy, shares his two favorite Gottman ideas. ...

Read More

Stress-proof your relationship this holiday season

How to Stress-Proof Your Relationship This Holiday Season

Kyle Benson

Cultivate an attitude of gratitude around your partner and loved ones during the holidays. ...

Read More

How Do Gottman Principles Apply to the Dating World?

Stacy Hubbard

How to date the Gottman way ...

Read More

building trust with teens

Building Trust with Teenagers

Lawrence Jackson

Connect with the young person in your life by being their safe space ...

Read More

Subscribe to Gottman Love Notes

Sign up and start your relationship transformation. Subscribe and get the latest on relationships, therapy, and much more from the experts. Includes a free download and access to special pricing on Gottman products every month