Get Back on Track During Conflict

Turn arguments around and manage conflict with a few simple phrases.

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Turn arguments around and manage conflict with a few simple phrases.

Turn arguments around and manage conflict with a few simple phrases.

Couple in Conflict

Even in a healthy relationship, mistakes, carelessness, and conflict are inevitable. The right repairs at the right time can make all the difference. ⁠

Resolve disagreements and get your message through by finding common ground, sharing when you feel persuaded, and stating when you need to take a break or when you feel that you’re both moving towards a solution.⁠

Getting Back On Track During Conflict: Pause, Rewind, Repair

I just need this to be calmer right now 
Can I take that back?
I need your support right now 
Can we take a break?
Let me try again
I’m sorry
I really messed up, I can see my part in this
I want to say this more gently but I don’t know how
I know that this isn’t your fault
Thank you for…
I understand
I love you

Together, you can get back on track during conflict.⁠

Repair is one of the best tools a couple can have at their disposal. Learn how to use repairs in the Gottman Relationship Coach: All About Conflict collection of workshops, video exercises and more.


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The Gottman Institute’s Editorial Team is composed of staff members who contribute to the Institute’s overall message. It is our mission to reach out to individuals, couples, and families in order to help create and maintain greater love and health in relationships.