you know before the break i said hey it’s not money i’ll give you a spoiler alert because of course that’s the first thing anyone would guess for talking about what’s the top thing american couples fight about it’s not money in this particular case according to yougov do hear that every once in a while though money divorce number one money is not in this case it’s not money you want to take a gander i have two guesses i have a silly guest and a serious serious gas is like parenting style and their kids good guess not ok my silly guess is the toilet seat up or down no the number one thing american couples fight about is tone of voice or attitude yeah i could relate i was going to say now you know that know tone sometimes like it’s the tone it’s the tone or the attitude i’m really big into this like world renowned couples therapist the gutman julie and john gottman they’re amazing anyway they say they have their list of things that causes divorce and the tone or