Days of Love
Chocolate Box Calendar
Day 1 - 3
Day 1
Tiny Actions = Big Results
Small Things Often
Relationships grow through everyday moments of care and attention. Small actions done often build trust and love over time. These moments may seem insignificant in the moment, but they quietly shape how safe and supported your partner feels with you.
Today’s Challenge: Do one small, thoughtful thing for your partner. Choose something that makes their day a little brighter or easier. Small actions matter more than you’d think.
Day 2
Ask Curious Questions
Open-Ended Question and Love Maps
Knowing what’s happening in your partner’s inner world strengthens emotional intimacy and connection. Love Maps grow when you stay curious about who your partner is today, not just who they were when you met.
Today’s Challenge: Ask your partner one curious open-ended question, then really listen to the answer. Don’t try to give advice, just stay interested.
Day 3
Pay Attention to Each Other
Bids for Connection and Turning Towards
Relationships thrive when partners feel seen, heard, and responded to in small moments throughout the day. These moments, what Gottman calls “bids,” are how partners ask for connection, often in subtle ways.
Today’s Challenge: Notice one bid for connection from your partner today, and turn towards it. If they sigh, say something like, “hey, look at that cool bird!,” or quirk their brow at you, respond with attention, warmth, and interest.
Day 4 - 7
Day 4
Repairing Hurts
Repair Attempts
Conflict happens in every relationship. Repair attempts help couples recover from conflict and prevent small hurts from turning into lasting resentment.
Today’s Challenge: If you find yourself in conflict big or small, offer a repair today. Offer an apology, a kind word, a gesture, or a moment of understanding. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be effective.
Day 5
Compromise
Solvable vs. Perpetual Problems
Some arguments can be solved, but a lot of relationship conflict is perpetual. This means that you might keep arguing about the same thing over and over again, even for years. Every couple has a set of perpetual problems. Learning to compromise keeps you from becoming stuck, or gridlocked, in them.
Today’s Challenge: Identify one ongoing disagreement. Instead of trying to “win,” look for one place where you can bend or better understand your partner. And vice versa!
Day 6
How Was Your Day, Honey?”
Stress-Reducing Conversation
Feeling supported with everyday stress builds emotional safety and deepens friendship. These conversations aren’t about solving problems, they’re just about being there for each other.
Today’s Challenge: Take 10 minutes to talk to each other about your day. One person speaks, and the other listens, then swap roles. Remember to listen with empathy and don’t try to fix anything unless you’re asked for advice.
Day 7
Make Up So You Don’t Break Up
The Aftermath of a Fight
How you recover from conflict matters more than how often you argue. The aftermath is where understanding, trust, and repair are built.
Today’s Challenge: If there’s lingering tension in your relationship, take one step towards repair: acknowledge feelings, take responsibility, or express understanding. Talking it through can help you make up and move on.
Day 8 - 11
Day 8
Do You Choose Me?
Commitment
Commitment creates emotional safety and reinforces the sense of “we’re in this together.” It reassures your partner that the relationship is secure, even during stress or times of uncertainty.
Today’s Challenge: Express your commitment to your partner today through words or actions. Let your partner know you choose them every day, in small and big ways.
Day 9
Can I Rely on You?
Trust
Trust is built moment by moment, through consistency and responsiveness. Each kept promise and each follow-through strengthens your bond.
Today’s Challenge: Follow Through on one promise or responsibility, even a small one. Reliability builds trust in your relationship.
Day 10
Let’s Do It Together
Accepting Influence
Couples who share decisions and power in their relationship feel more connected, respected, and on the same team. Accepting influence doesn’t mean losing yourself, it means valuing your partner’s voice.
Today’s Challenge: Invite your partner’s input on a decision today, and really listen to their opinion. Accepting your partner’s influence helps you act as a united front.
Day 11
Dreams and Goals
Make Life Dreams Come True
Supporting each other’s dreams builds meaning and purpose in your life together. Feeling understood in your dreams strengthens your bond.
Today’s Challenge: Share one dream or goal, big or small, with your partner. Ask about their dreams too. Listen with curiosity, and identify one way you can support each other in your dreams.
Day 12 - 14
Day 12
Between the Sheets
Intimacy and Exploration
Healthy intimacy starts with communication, curiosity, and emotional safety. Talking openly about sex will help you feel closer and more satisfied.
Today’s Challenge: Talk about sex. Couples who talk about it have it more often, and they have a more satisfying sex life. Talk about what you like, what you want to try, or what helps you feel close. Keep it open and judgement-free.
Day 13
The Six Second Kiss
Six Second Kiss!
Small moments of physical connection strengthen your emotional bond and reduce stress.
Today’s Challenge: Share a full six second kiss! Dr. Gottman calls it a “kiss with potential” because it can lead to deeper intimacy. Remember to slow down and stay present.
Day 14
Date Night
Fondness and Admiration, Friendship, Intimacy
Dedicating regular time to your connection can help you keep your love alive and stay emotionally close over time.
Today’s Challenge: Create a moment just for the two of you today. Share appreciations, laugh, reminisce together, and talk about your future together. Remove any distractions and focus on each other. Connection doesn’t require perfection, just presence.
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