Small Things Often

Welcome to Small Things Often, a podcast from The Gottman Institute Successful long-term relationships are created through small words, small … Continued

L is for Love & Like

“Love” is the obvious word here. But with all due respect to love, it’s probably a little too obvious for my tastes. Don’t get me wrong, I love love, but it often clouds the real issue at the heart of a relationship.

The Art and Science of Love – Virtual Events

Created by “the Einstein of Love” (Psychology Today), this two-day workshop is grounded on what actually works in relationships that are happy and stable. See for yourself why millions of couples worldwide have benefited from the Gottman Method.

Includes the Art & Science of Love box set.  Please allow time for shipping.  Please Note: This is a live online event. To attend, you will need a reliable internet connection. Our staff will reach out to you with your personal registration and access information.

The Art and Science of Love – Online

Now on Sale! For the first time, John and Julie Gottman’s Art & Science of Love couples workshop is available online for you and your partner to take together from the comfort of your own home.

The 3 Phases of Love

What do you do if you love, but are no longer in love with, your partner?

The Art and Science of Love – Live

Created by “the Einstein of Love” (Psychology Today), this two-day workshop is grounded on what actually works in relationships that are happy and stable. See for yourself why millions of couples worldwide have benefited from the Gottman Method.

Please Note: Due to concerns for the health and wellbeing of our customers and staff during the ongoing COVID-19 outbreak, we have cancelled all live events in 2020. 

What Makes Love Last?

Learn how a couple can protect or recover its greatest gift — their love for one another.

Gottman Relationship Coach Bundle: All About Love

Drs. John and Julie Gottman are excited to introduce a new collection, All About Love as part of the Gottman Relationship Coach.  With more than 40 years of research into relationships, Drs. John and Julie Gottman are here to share their knowledge with you. Learn from the experts in this new Gottman Relationship Coach Bundle, which combines three of our most popular products: “How to Make Your Relationship Work,” “Loving Out Loud,” and “Building a Life Together.”

To Love, or to Like?

”Like” is a word that is underrated, while the word “love” steals all of the attention.

The Top Myths about Lust and Love and How They can Ruin Your Sex Life (Part Two)

In this article, Certified Gottman Therapist Dr. Cheryl Fraser continues to debunk love life ideas that you’ve got to be in the mood and that great love “just happens.”

The Love Lab

Dr. Gottman opens his long-awaited book, What Makes Love Last?, with an unsettling anecdote about trust: suspecting his wife of cheating, one man crept outside in the morning before he left for work to draw chalk marks on his wife’s rear tires.

Love Map & Open-Ended Card Decks

These cards enable partners to connect emotionally, and increase intimacy and understanding in a fun, gentle way.

Due to popular demand, this product is currently out of stock. 

The Sound Relationship House: Build Love Maps

Love Maps help you develop greater personal insight and a more detailed understanding of each other’s life and world.

The Story of The Art and Science of Love 2

How two Certified Gottman Therapists created a follow-up workshop to The Art and Science of Love.

Gottman Love and Sexuality Glossary

Our guide on combining forms used to express different types of love and relationships, and how you may see them used.

Summer Romance: Love Maps

As promised in last week’s posting on The Gottman Relationship Blog, we continue ourSummer Romance blog series today with an exercise to help you build connection with your partner by updating your “Love Maps.”

Inside the Love Lab

Dr. Gottman’s research on trust is groundbreaking. Widely recognized as the world’s foremost researcher on marriage and relationships, his intuition and natural ease with people are not his only gifts. 

The Science of Love

In his TEDx Talk, John Gottman explains how his scientific research has created a new understanding of love relationships.

Premarital Relationships: Building Love Maps

Here are examples that will help you build a love map to your partner’s heart.

Build Love Maps

Dr. Gottman’s term for getting to know your partner’s world is called Build Love Maps.

Love Map Building

Learn the inner world of your partner by building love maps.

Setting a Daily Love Aspiration

Be intentional about showing how much you care

Gottman Love Lab

“Since the 1980s, Gottman has brought more than three thousand married couples—just like Bill and Sue—into that small room in … Continued

The Top Myths about Lust and Love and How They can Ruin your Sex Life (Part One)

If you’re worried your sex life is over, sex therapist Dr. Cheryl Fraser is here to dismantle the beliefs that mess with your head and your bed.

Gottman Love Notes

Gottman Love Notes is a research-based newsletter featuring the latest and greatest from The Gottman Institute. Whether you’re new to Gottman … Continued

How I Almost Quit Couples Therapy—and Love—Until Mindfulness Saved Me

Our ability to observe the workings of our mind, challenge our stories, and see what is really happening is a major predictor of happiness.

I Fell in Love With My Best Friend

I found myself feeling like there was a different kind of connection forming, beyond best friendship. Could this be?

16 Ways to Fall in Love All Over Again

These tips will help reignite the spark in your marriage.

Can Love and Connection Heal Addiction?

Many of us in the clinical community observed how supportive relationships led to better outcomes for those in recovery.

Set Yourself Up for Success Before Taking The Art and Science of Love Online

Tips to help you and your partner get most out of your self-guided workshop experience.

How New Parents Keep Their Love Alive and Well

A Bringing Baby Home Educator shares relationship enhancing strategies that parents learn in the Bringing Baby Home Workshop.

The Art and Science of Love is for Everyone

Get your relationship off to a healthy beginning and keep it healthy. 

Learning to Love Again After an Affair

Is it possible to rebuild trust after your partner has been unfaithful?

We Will Grieve Forever Because We Love Forever

Research suggests that physicians underestimate the level and duration of grief experienced by parents of stillborn babies.

What Porcupines Can Teach Us About Making Love

Dr. Gottman’s “porcupine sex” story is a comical depiction of an all-too-familiar dynamic between men and women in the bedroom.

5 Premarital Conversations to Help You Sustain Love

Engagement is such an exciting time, but you should have these five premarital conversations before you tie the knot.

Living Apart With Love

Mindfully managing co-parenting from separate households during shelter-in-place conditions.

Love Smarter by Learning When to Take a Break

Breaks give you time to calm down, deepen your perspective, and have a successful “do-over” with your partner.

The Art and Science of Love

Nov 2021
Homewood Suites by Hilton – Baltimore 625 South President Street
Baltimore, MD 21202 United States

Where Did The Love Go?

The phone rings often at The Gottman Institute. Last week, I answered a call from a young woman distressed about arguments that were ruining what had been, till then, an easy-going relationship with her husband.

The Art and Science of Love

Dec 2021
DoubleTree by Hilton Boston Logan Airport Chelsea 201 Everett Avenue
Chelsea, MA 02150 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Feb 2022
Executive Inn and Suites – Oakland 1755 Embarcadero Ste. I
Oakland, CA 94606 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Nov 2021
12724 Gran Bay Parkway West 12724 Gran Bay Parkway West
Jacksonville, FL 32258 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Feb 2022
Executive Inn and Suites – Oakland 1755 Embarcadero Ste. I
Oakland, CA 94606 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Nov 2022
Double Tree Hilton North Shore Conference Center 9599 Skokie Boulevard
Skokie, IL 60077 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Jun 2022
Double Tree Hilton North Shore Conference Center 9599 Skokie Boulevard
Skokie, IL 60077 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Mar 2022
Double Tree Hilton North Shore Conference Center 9599 Skokie Boulevard
Skokie, IL 60077 United States

The Digital Age: The First Duty of Love is to Listen

The following is a short and sweet overview of Dr. Gottman’s skills for Active Listening*. For much more on the … Continued

The Art and Science of Love

Feb 2022
Pathways to Wellness 3505 Cadillac Ave, Building O, Suite 109
Costa Mesa, CA 92626 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Jun 2022
Pathways to Wellness 3505 Cadillac Ave, Building O, Suite 109
Costa Mesa, CA 92626 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Apr 2022
Pathways to Wellness 3505 Cadillac Ave, Building O, Suite 109
Costa Mesa, CA 92626 United States

The Art and Science of Love

Oct 2021
Hampton Inn & Suites Thousand Oaks 510 North Ventu Park Road
Thousand Oaks, CA 91320 United States

Dating a Man 16 Years Younger Forced Me to Grow Up

The deeper I fell, the more fearful I became, and the more I looked for imperfections.

Loving Out Loud

Loving out Loud!  Find the Passion Again.  You and your partner must nurture a culture of fondness and admiration to find that spark again. In this all-new series of exercises, activities, and videos, Drs. John and Julie Gottman can show you how to love your partner even better. Upgrade your love life with this research-based series of conversations, skills, and practices designed to enhance the fondness and admiration in your relationship. In this program you will learn:

  • All about the Sound Relationship House and how to build your own.
  • How to ask better questions that lead to richer conversations.
  • Better and more effective ways to express your love.
  • How to get specific about the things you appreciate, and communicate them in ways your partner will really hear.
  • What skills the “Masters of Relationships” practice regularly and how to implement them in your own relationship.

Limited Time Offer!

“Buy Now” will take you to GOTTMAN CONNECT to purchase and view this product.

Love Quiz: Do You Truly Know Your Partner?

Find out how well you truly know your partner.

My Sexual Fluidity Woke Me Up

Judgments dehumanise and minimise the beautiful greyness of being human.

The Three Keys to Passion

If I’m looking to build the ultimate passionate relationship, a love affair filled with joy, intensity, loyalty, and desire, a relationship that becomes deeper and sexier as time goes on, then I want to build that on a very strong foundation.

Love Quiz: Is It Time to Leave Your Relationship?

When asked what advice he would give his younger self, Dr. Gottman said “Get out of bad relationships sooner.”

February 2016

This month Dr. John Gottman presented “Making Love Last and Marriage Work” as part of the 2016 ParentMap Lecture Series, … Continued

5 Ways to Make Small Gestures Count in Your Marriage

Give your partner the gift of love and appreciation in small ways every day.

Sound Relationship Postcards

Send love near and far! Based on the Gottmans’ Sound Relationship House model, this set of postcards provides 32 opportunities to say “I love you,” “I miss you,” or “I’m thinking of you.”

Eight Dates

Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love


John Gottman and Brené Brown on Running Headlong Into Heartbreak

The Gottmans and Brené Brown give us a map—a macro perspective of the wilderness of our hearts, and the wildness of love.

The Perfect Relationship

Never underestimate the power of making a few small, simple changes within your relationship to develop the skills needed to make your love flourish for many years to come.

Love Quiz: Are You Experiencing Negative Sentiment Override?

Take this quiz to see if your relationship is suffering from a negative perspective.

Love Quiz: Do You Trust Your Partner?

Dr. Gottman has established a way to mathematically evaluate trust in a relationship.

Love Quiz: How Positively Do You View Your Partner?

Access the level of positivity in your relationship.

What to Read to Set Your Relationship Up For Success

Don’t know where to start? Here are the books and programs to get your love on the right track

The Eight Conversations That Matter Most in Relationships

From the country’s leading relationship experts, comes ‘Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love.’

Salsa Card Deck

Make continued romance and sex a priority with your partner using these cards developed from our world-renowned couples workshop!

Love Quiz: Do You and Your Partner Have Shared Goals?

When you share goals, you create new meaning for your relationship.

Love Quiz: How Well Do You Repair Your Relationship?

All couples argue. Successful couples repair.

Love Quiz: How Well Do You Connect Emotionally With Your Partner?

Turning toward your partner is the foundation of trust, emotional connection, and passionate sex.

Love Quiz: How Much Do You Admire and Respect Your Partner?

Assess the state of your fondness and admiration system.

Love Quiz: What is the State of Compromise in Your Relationship?

Take this quiz to assess the state of compromise in your relationship.

Love Quiz: Fondness and Admiration

If life chipped away at your fondness and admiration for each other, the route to bringing them back begins with realizing how valuable they are.

Love Quiz: What Is The State of Your Sex Life?

Take the following quiz to assess the quality of sex, romance, and passion in your relationship.

The Importance Of Integrity

Integrity is the true source of deep love, adventure, and even self-confidence.

Exclusive Interview With John Gottman

Attunement is the desire and the ability to understand and respect your partner’s inner world.

Integrating Gottman Method into Premarital Counseling

My practice as a Marriage and Family Therapist is focused on proactively transforming nearly newlyweds into competent love birds by teaching The Gottman Method

August 2015

This month we were featured in an 8,000 word essay from The Huffington Post, presented 16 couples workshops and professional trainings around the world, and Dr. John Gottman was named “the Einstein of love” by Psychology Today.

‘Sliding Door’ Moments

Sliding door moments are the seemingly inconsequential everyday moments that make or break the most important relationships in our lives.

Expressing Compassion and Empathy

Intimate conversation requires you to lean into your partner’s pain before you offer advice or try to help.

May 2016

This month we hosted The Art and Science of Love couples workshop in Seattle, recognized Mother’s Day by asking our readers to … Continued

The Three Boxes

Drs. John and Julie Gottman divides the behaviors of conversing couples into three clear boxes: Nice, Neutral, and Nasty.

Why We Created The Gottman Couples Retreat Board Game

After attending The Art & Science of Love weekend workshop, we loved what these tools had done for our relationship and we wanted to find a way to bring them to others.

Intimate Conversations and Collective Monologue

Stop having superficial conversations where you’re talking but not communicating.

Put Feelings Into Words and Ask Open-Ended Questions

Enjoy more intimate conversations by learning to label your emotions and asking questions that beg for a detailed response.

It’s Okay to Go to Bed Angry

You can love better tomorrow, even if it’s difficult today.

The #1 Thing Couples Fight About

According to the Einstein of Love, Dr. John Gottman, the #1 thing couples fight about is nothing.

Research Reveals the Secret to “Happily Ever After”

If you think the way to eternal love is through grand gestures of romance and passion, think again.

3 Ways to Invest in Your Relationship

Make deposits into the wealth of your relationship and see dividends in love.

A Letter to My Younger Self on My Wedding Day

Here are a few things I’ve learned about love and life over the last 23 years of marriage.

The Zeigarnik Effect

This theory discovered an enormous capacity to destroy human relationships.

Building Bridges

If partners build habits of turning towards each other in simple everyday moments, they build bridges of affection, fondness, and admiration.

The Seven Principles – Digital Couples Set

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the bestselling and acclaimed culmination of four decades of research, presented in an accessible format to anyone who longs for stronger, healthier relationships. Digital Materials.

The Seven Principles – Couples Set

A new and improved version of our Seven Principles Couples Set for use in workshops, clinical practices, and at home. Physical Materials.

Navigating the Challenges of Stepfamily Life

A successful remarriage and building a new stepfamily requires a foundation built on appreciation, respect, and tolerance.

Spring Clean Your Marriage

Spring clean your marriage with these relational tips that will clear out the cobwebs and refresh the love and romance.

Stop Trying to Fix Your Partner’s Feelings

Instead of trying to change or fix the feelings of the person you love, focus on connecting with them.

Understanding Your Partner’s Attachment Style: An Interview with Stan Tatkin

The environment of our upbringing influences the way we love and expect to be loved.

What Do Women Really Want?

It is not as complicated as you think.

5 Ways to Make Money Work For You

This week on The Gottman Relationship Blog, we’ve been tackling the subject of money. As promised in Wednesday’s post, today we will share creative approaches to fight the destructive effects of financial stress on your relationships and help you to strengthen bonds with those you love!

The Little Things You Do

We asked our followers to share some of the “small words, small gestures, and small acts” their partners do for them. Our hearts were so warmed by the responses, we’d love to share some of them with you.

Three Steps to a Healthy, Happy, Partnered Life

Live a long love life with these simple steps.

The 5 Types of Couples

Are you one of the happy couple types?

How Anxious Attachment Can Be Healthy in a Relationship

Attachment shapes our capacity to love and the styles of a partner can influence the success or failure of the relationship.

Taking Care of the Caretaker in Your Life

Show your love and support for the one who helps everyone else

Your Attachment Style Influences the Success of Your Relationship

The quality of our early attachments profoundly influences our relationships later in life.

How to Rescue Your Marriage from Empty Nest Syndrome

One chapter has ended but another has just begun.

Gottman Relationship Recipes

Try these relationship recipes out at home—you probably already have all the ingredients you need!