… ! I’d never do that!”
If your answer is “Yes,” then, unfortunately, you are not alone in needing to learn how to be more empathetic and stop being so defensive in your relationship.
Research shows defensiveness is highly destructive in relationshipsÂ
Couples therapists and researchers John and Julie Gottman include defensiveness in what they call The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in relationships: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. The Gottmans know. After all, they’re not just therapists, they’ve spent decades researching and studying what makes relationships thrive, setting a …